翻译:Carol 校对:白羽黑鹭 英语字幕来源：tvsubtitles.net
消消气
别吃饼干 马上该吃晚饭了 No, no, don't eat cookies, it's almost time for dinner.
出去吃怎么样？ Why don't we go out?
-中餐吗？ -中餐很好啊 - Chinese? - Chinese, that would be great.
我们可以先去喝点东西 We could stop and get a drink first.
"先去喝点东西"什么意思？ What do you mean stop and have a drink first?
我们可以先去... 你知道我想去哪儿吗？ We can stop at... You know where I want to go?
卡萨德尔玛 那个海边的高档餐厅 Casa Del Mar, the fancy restaurant by the water.
我们可以先去慢悠悠地喝点小酒 We can stop and have a leisurely drink.
你在开玩笑吗？在餐厅里就能喝酒啊 Are you kidding? You can have a drink at the restaurant.
但是这样很好啊 No, but this will be nice.
在外面逛一逛 喝点酒 It'll be just a few hours of hanging out, having a drink.
你先是想中途停下来 You know, first you want to just stop off...
在那儿喝酒 然后再回车上 and have a drink there, and then get back in the car...
然后再开去餐厅 and then drive to the restaurant.
好像你应该直接到餐厅喝酒 不是吗？ It seems like you should just go and get the drink at the restaurant, no?
我想在路上停下来喝点东西 I would like to stop off and have a drink on the way.
都是喝酒 在哪儿喝有区别吗？ It's the same drink, what's the difference where you have the drink?
氛围不一样 你知道吗... It's a different atmosphere. You know what...
我不知道 氛围有什么不一样？ l don't understand, it's a different atmosphere?
-怎么了 我以为... -对啊 - What, I thought... - Yeah.
就只是喝个酒 不是吗？餐厅里有酒啊 But it's the drink, isn't it? They have the drink at the restaurant.
氛围怎么样有什么关系？ What's the difference what the atmosphere is?
-关系很大 -可是你不想吃饭吗？ - It's a big difference. - But don't you want to eat?
我是想吃饭... I do want to eat...
但是我也想好好坐下来 喝酒 社交 but I would like to sit and have a drink and socialize...
身边不会有人把食物端来端去 and not have food passing by us.
我不明白你在打算一会儿就离开去吃东西的情况下 I don't see how you could sit and have a drink...
怎么还能好好坐下来喝酒 knowing that you want to leave to eat.
想着食物的时候... When you're thinking about food...
你怎么还能放松的喝酒 这根本不... how can you sit and relax and have a drink, it doesn't...
你完全没理解喝酒的意义 You're missing the whole point of the drink.
没错！喝酒的意义到底是什么？我的确不知道 That's it! What is the point of the drink? I am missing the point.
因为那是所有人都坐着 喝着鸡尾酒 互相社交的地方 Because it's a place where everyone's sitting, having cocktails and socializing.
那干嘛还去餐厅？如果去餐厅不算社交 干嘛还要去？ Then why even go to the restaurant? If the restaurant isn't socializing, then why?
我不想去了 I don't wanna go.
好 那吃外带好了 Fine, we'll just get takeout food, great.
-这样很好 -是啊 - That's fine. Good. - Yeah.
-这个给您 -非常感谢 - Here you are, sir. - Thank you very much.
-这是您的外带 -好的 - And here's your food. - Okay.
-请慢用 -谢谢 - Enjoy your dinner. - Thank you.
再见 Bye-bye.
赶牛 赶牛 赶牛 Rolling, rolling, rolling
回来啦 All right.
赶着牛儿跑 Keep those doggies rolling
呼哈！ Rawhide!
茱莉亚路易斯-德利法斯来电话了 Julia Louis-Dreyfus called.
知道了 Okay.
-你跟她说了那个主意吗？ -还没 我打算明天跟她说 - Did you tell her the idea yet? - No, l'm gonna pitch it to her tomorrow.
我敢打赌她一定会喜欢的 She's gonna love it, I bet.
-真的吗？ -是啊 你不觉得？ - Yeah? - Yeah, don't you think?
-到时看吧 -我的胳膊肘好疼 - We'll see. - My elbow is killing me.
该死的网球肘 This tennis elbow.
你知道你应该做什么吗 你应该打电话给乔乔 Yeah, you know what you should do, you should call Jojo.
你不是说他有时候会留下印子吗？ Didn't you say he leaves marks on you sometimes?
会有点黑青 但是他能治好你 He leaves some black and blue marks, but he'll fix it.
-这是什么？蒜瓣面？ -看着不像是宫保虾 - What is this? Is this garlic noodles? - That does not look like kung pao shrimp.
这不是我们的饭 This isn't our food.
你走的时候检查订单了吗？ Did you check the order before you left?
对 查了 但是我决定拿错 Yeah, I did, but I decided to take the wrong food home.
多谢提醒 Thank you for inquiring.
那你只能回去一趟了 Well, I guess you'll just have to run back there...
把我们点的饭拿回来 and get the right order.
麻烦死了 What a pain in the ass.
你能快点吗... If you could hurry, that would be great...
我尽量 l'll try.
-我好饿 -蠢透了 - I'm really hungry. - Idiots.
-先生您好 有什么可以帮您？ -我拿错订单了 - Yes, sir, how can I help you? - We got the wrong order here.
-真是抱歉 您是大卫吗？ -是的 - I'm so sorry, are you David? - Yeah.
那个人刚把你订的餐送回来 在这儿 十分抱歉 That man just brought back your order. This is it, l'm so sorry that happened.
先生？ Sir?
这是我的？ Okay, this is mine?
-是你的 -好的 谢谢你 - This is yours. - Okay, thank you.
不客气 You're welcome.
天哪 My God.
-这是你的饭 -什么？ - Here's your food. - What?
-我们把订单搞错了 -天哪 - We got our orders mixed up. - God.
你差点就吃了我的宫保虾 You almost had my kung pao shrimp.
-你怎么样？ -还不错 你呢？ - How are you? - Good, how are you doing?
-挺好的 你一切都好吧？ -嗯 - Good, everything good? - Yeah.
-谢丽儿也好吧？ -都好 - Cheryl good? - Yeah.
-在HBO怎么样？ -好极了 特别棒 - How's everything at HBO? - Tremendous, just terrific.
-真的？ -是的 - Yeah? - Yeah.
美妙无比 再好不过了 Wonderful, couldn't be better.
那就好 Good.
-我们出去吧 -好 - We should get out of here. - Yeah.
我回来了 I'm back.
太好了 Good.
-终于回来了 -取餐很愉快 - Good. - That was really pleasant.
太谢谢你了 不会白跑的 Thank you so much. It'll be worth it.
你知道我碰到谁了吗？艾伦沃瑟曼 就是他拿了我们的饭 You know who I ran into? Allan Wasserman. That's who had our food.
-我认识他吗？ -HBO的 HBO的主席 - Do I know him? - The guy from HBO, the president of HBO.
记得两年前吗 我退出了那个专场 Yeah, remember two years ago, l got out of that special.
我跟他说我的继父出了事故 I told him my stepfather got in an accident.
想起来了 为什么要编继父的谎？ Yeah, why did you make up a lie about a stepfather?
-你都没有继父 -我就是觉得这样谎会撒得好一点 - You don't even have a stepfather. - I just thought it was a better lie.
因为如果你编了一个关于继父的谎... 'Cause if you make up a lie about a stepfather...
别人会相信的 你不觉得吗？ you'll be believed, don't you think?
-当时肯定很尴尬 -是啊 特别尴尬呢 - That must've been awkward. - Yeah, it was pretty awkward.
但是他刚才没提这个 我也没说... But he didn't mention anything, and neither did l...
所以我也不知道 so I don't know.
-吃点面吗？ -来几个宫保虾 - Want some noodles? - Get some of this kung pao shrimp.
虾都去哪儿了？ Where's all the shrimp here?
虾都去哪儿了？只有三个虾 Where's all the shrimp? There's only three shrimp.
-那么大的盒子只有... -对 只有三个 - In that giant container, there's... - Yeah, three shrimp.
-通常更多些 -一般有差不多十个 - There's usually more than that. - There's usually, like, 10.
你都吃了吧 You can have them.
他是不是把虾吃了？ Did he take the shrimp?
我打赌是他把虾吃了 I'll bet he took the shrimp.
-沃瑟曼？ -嗯 - Wasserman? - Yeah.
他可能正好饿了 又拿到了这盒饭 He was probably hungry. He got the container.
他知道这不是他点的 He knew, he saw it wasn't his food.
但还是把虾吃了 然后又送回餐馆 And he ate shrimp, and then brought it back.
他真会做出这样的事吗？ Would he really do something like that, though?
什么叫"他真会？"只剩三个虾了 What do you mean, "Would he really?" There's three shrimp in there.
我可不想吃别人剩下的 I really don't want to be eating after somebody else.
我是说 真有这种人 Well, I mean, it's just the whole notion of the guy gets the wrong order of food...
吃了错拿的食物 and takes food that doesn't belong to him.
然后再送回去？以为我们不会注意到吗？ And then returns it? What, thinking we're not gonna notice this?
这家伙吃了我们的虾 The guy took our shrimp.
好啊 厉害了 Good, nice move.
嗨 拉儿 很高兴见到你 Hi, Lar. It's good to see you.
-很高兴见到你 -路上花了不少时间吧？ - Yeah, good to see you. - Did it take you a long time to get here?
大概二十五分钟 半小时吧 Maybe about 25 minutes, half hour.
-天哪 交通太差了 -对啊 - My God, that traffic. - Yeah.
下次我去你办公室 Next time, l'll come to your office.
-不用 你在开玩笑吗？ -没有啊 - No, what are you kidding? - No, l'm not kidding.
-下次我过去 -我很乐意来你办公室 - I'll come next time. - I'm happy to come to your office.
你不必过去 我来就行 You don't have to come, l'm happy to come here.
我们可以来来回回 No, we can go back and forth.
不用来来回回 只要我来 不用你回 We don't need back and forth, we'll just do forth. Don't need back.
你变成了个大好人啊 You've turned into a very nice man.
我就是个好好先生 I'm a lovely gentleman.
-好了 你的点子是什么？我很想知道 -是这样的 - So, what's this idea? I'm dying to hear it. - All right, here's the idea.
-说吧 -你演一个女演员 - Yeah. - You play an actress...
她演了一个特别红的电视剧 像《宋飞正传》那样的 who was on a big TV show, a big hit show, like a Seinfeld.
那个剧结束以后... And when the show ends...
她很难再找到新的工作了 the actress has trouble getting work.
因为所有人都觉得她就是... Because everybody identifies her with this character...
她在电视剧里演的那个角色 who she played on the show.
-这样啊 -比如说她演了"艾芙琳" - Right. - Let's say she played "Evelyn," okay?
嗯 Okay.
然后她开始慢慢的讨厌艾芙琳这个角色 And she grows to hate the character Evelyn,
并因此变得脾气暴躁 and she becomes embittered and hostile.
见到她的人都冲她喊"艾芙琳" All these people who are yelling out, "Evelyn" all the time...
所有人都希望她演艾芙琳 and everybody wants her to do Evelyn.
这让她没办法继续新的工作 And she can't get work because of Evelyn.
-这个剧就是讲这个的？ -没错 - And that's the show? - That's the show.
-真的很有趣 -你也觉得？ - That's a pretty interesting idea. - You think so?
我喜欢的...你知道的 是这种事的确会发生在我身上 The thing that I love about it is that, you know, this does happen to me.
的确发生在你身上 你能应对的了 And it happens to you, you're able to deal with this.
"伊莲 伊莲 你是伊莲吗？" "Elaine, Elaine, are you Elaine?"
这事上周才发生过 我当时在滑雪 That happened to me last week, l was skiing.
"艾芙琳 艾芙琳" 剧里就会有这样的事 "Evelyn, Evelyn." lt'll be on the series.
"嘿 艾芙琳" "Hey, Evelyn."
这名字不错 That's a good name for the series.
这个怎么样："你不是艾芙琳吗？" How about this: Aren't You Evelyn?
"你不是艾芙琳吗？" Aren't You Evelyn?
挺不错 That's pretty good.
我觉得这个主意很有趣 I mean, I think it's a really funny idea.
但是我在想是不是有人更适合这个角色... But I wonder if it's better suited for somebody...
比如杰森 you know, like Jason.
杰森 我不觉得... Jason, I don't...
-我来告诉你为什么 -这完全不适合杰森 - Let me tell you why. - This isn't Jason at all.
-因为... -我觉得他根本演不了 - Because... - I think he's completely wrong for it.
我是说 他演了那么一个... I mean, but he played such a...
我不知道 在剧里像个白痴 l don't know, an idiot on the show.
可能这个角色会更适合像杰森那样的人 Maybe it would be better suited for somebody like Jason.
我能想象出你比杰森沮丧的多... I could see you being more frustrated than Jason...
因为你知道你能演各种不同的角色 'cause you know how many different things you can do.
这倒没错 Yeah, that's true.
真的 悄悄跟你说 他也就只能演那个了 Really, this is all he can do, between you and me.
是的 我更加... Yeah, you know, l'm more...
-对 你更多才多艺 -多才多艺 - Yeah, you're more versatile. - Versatile.
-所以我觉得你最适合 -好吧 我很喜欢这个点子 - That's why I see it for you. - Yeah, all right, I like this idea a lot.
-真的吗？ -嗯 我很喜欢 - You do? - Yeah, I like it.
-那太好了 很高兴你喜欢 -我们去推给 HBO 吧 - Good, l'm so relieved. - So let's pitch it to HBO.
HBO？ At HBO?
我想能说"操" 你懂的 我还想说... I want to be able to say "fuck," you know. And I wanna say...
能说"操"有什么重要的？ What's the big deal about saying "fuck"?
"狗杂种" "Cocksucker."
你不会想说这个的 You don't need to say that.
其实我真的想 我一般都不能说这些 Actually, I do. I haven't really gotten to say that a lot.
我都没说过 我希望能够说这些 "操" I haven't. I would like to be able to say that. "Fuck."
何况我跟那个... Besides, I have a little problem with that...
管事儿的人有点过节 艾伦沃瑟曼 the guy who runs it up there, Allan Wasserman.
-主席？ -对 - The president? - Yeah.
什么过节？ What problem?
我觉得他不是个好人 我不想说具体的原因 I think he's a bad guy, l'm not gonna go into why.
我就只是觉得他不是个好人 I just don't think he's a good guy at all.
那如果我们不需要跟他打交道呢？ But I mean, what if we didn't deal with him?
跟你说我为什么提这个吧 Let me tell you why l'm bringing this up.
我有个很好的朋友 迈克哈尔布莱施 他在那而工作 I've got a friend, a pretty good friend, Michael Halbreich, who works there.
-不知道你认不认识 -那个同性恋？ - I don't know if you know him. - Gay guy?
同性恋？不是的 他结婚了 Gay, no, he's not gay, he's married.
-迈克哈尔布莱施？ -对啊 - Michael Halbreich? - Yeah.
-真的？ -真的 他结婚了 - Really? - Yeah, he's married.
-我发誓他是弯的 那家伙 -不可能 我认识他好多年了 - I could have sworn he was gay, that guy. - No, l've known him for years.
我跟迈克和他的妻子一起打牌... I'm in a poker game with Michael and his wife...
挺好 我也想有牌局 That's great, I wish I was in a poker game.
我正想说这个呢 你加入我们吧 That's what I was gonna say. Why don't you join?
因为平时跟我们打牌的一对 Because one of the couples who's in the game...
他们要去加拉帕戈斯 没办法来了 they're going to the Galapagos lslands. They're not gonna to be around.
如果你和谢丽儿想来玩就太好了 And it would be great if you and Cheryl would like to play...
因为我们正好缺两个人 'cause we actually need another couple.
我问问谢丽儿 You know, l'll ask Cheryl.
即使她不想去我也会去的 I mean, l'll play even if she doesn't want to.
好的 问问她 这样你也可以借机认识迈克 Okay, yeah, ask her, and then you could also get to know him.
-他人很不错 -好的 - He's a nice guy. - Okay.
我就是希望 HBO 可以加入 真心的 I'd just like to put HBO in the mix, l'd really like to.
-好吧 HBO -太好了 真开心 - All right, HBO. - All right, exciting.
-就是这样 乔乔 加油 -闭嘴... - Thataway, Jojo. Get in there. - Shut...
-用力 -天哪 - Get in there. - My God.
这个女人对疼痛的忍耐力很强的 别担心 She has a very high tolerance for pain, this woman, don't worry about it.
等等 那个... Wait, that's...
茱莉亚路易斯-德利法斯邀请我们去打牌 Julia Louis-Dreyfus invited us to play poker.
她有这么个牌局... She's in this poker game...
你非要现在说这个吗？ Okay, do we have to talk about this right now?
-好了 -这样就好了？ - We're finished. - That's it?
-对 我只要洗下手就行了 -谢谢 - That's it, just got to wash my hands. - Thank you.
这家伙简直是个艺术家 The man's an artist.
-天哪 -怎么了 他伤着你了？ - My God. - What happened, he hurt you?
天哪 My God.
让我看看 这没什么 What do you got? That's nothing.
两天之后会更严重的 That's gonna be a lot worse in two days.
我真不喜欢你把快乐建立在我的痛苦之上 I really don't like that you're taking so much pleasure in this.
你们有润喉糖吗？ Anybody have a cough drop?
-渔夫之宝可以吗？ -当然 - Would you like a Fisherman's Friend? - Yeah, sure.
-好 给你一片 -谢谢 - All right, have one of these. - Thank you.
-你想来一片吗茱莉亚？ -好 谢谢 - Do you want one, Julia? - All right, thank you.
-你也来一片？ -不用了 - Would you like to try one? - No.
真不敢相信我们在这儿 I can't believe we're here.
是啊 难以置信 I know, this is amazing.
-推一部新剧 -真叫人激动 - Pitching another show. - It's exciting.
我们俩 一起合作 The two of us, doing this together?
老天 我完全不喜欢这个 Lord, I don't like this at all.
等下 Hang on a minute.
我很喜欢 你当她经纪人多久了？ I like it a lot. How long have you been her manager?
-三... -不 将近四年了 - Three... - No, almost, actually four years.
已经四年了？美好的时光总是过得很快 Is it four now? Time flies when you're having fun.
对啊 Yeah.
不美好的也很快 Even when you're not.
有这么个事 跟我说说你们怎么想 Tell me what you think of this, okay?
什么事？ What?
前几天晚上我老婆和我要出去吃中餐 My wife and I are going out for Chinese food the other night.
她说她想在半路停下来喝点东西 She said that she wants to stop off for a drink first.
我不懂 I don't get this.
为什么要先停车 去这么个酒店... Why park the car, go into this hotel...
喝酒 然后再出来... have the drink, then come back out...
再到车里 再开去餐厅 get in the car again, drive to the restaurant.
这不是浪费时间么 It seems like a huge waste of time.
在餐厅就可以喝酒啊 You can get a drink at the restaurant.
-这是种比较传统的... -对 是的 - It's sort of an old-fashioned... - Yeah, it is.
...浪漫的想法 你不觉得吗？ ...romantic idea, don't you think?
是啊 挺好的 Yeah, it's lovely.
我们只是要出门吃东西 We're just going out to eat.
-那你们最后去喝酒了吗？ -没有 - Did you go out for the drink? - No.
她生气了吗？ Was she mad?
很不开心 就因为这个 我俩现在关系有点紧张 Very annoyed. We're not on good terms because of it.
我觉得你完全没错 I think you were totally right.
瞧 对吧？ Yeah, see?
这完全没道理 除非她想跟你上床 It makes no sense, unless you're trying to get laid.
可能她就是想要这个 And maybe that's what she was trying to do.
也许谢丽儿是想跟你上床了 Maybe Cheryl wanted to get laid.
好吧 我懂你意思了 Okay, I got your point.
听着 一会儿由你俩主导 Listen, the two of you will take this.
我先来介绍 然后你们就接着我的话继续 行吗？ You know, l'll introduce it, and you'll run with it, okay?
-你们现在可以进去了 -那我们进去吧 - They're ready for you guys now. - Then here we go then.
准备好了吗？ You ready?
他们来了 There they are.
-嗨 最近还好吗？ -我也很高兴见到你 - Hi, how are you? - Good to see you, too.
嗨 迈克 你还好吗？ Hi, Michael, how are you?
-很好 -欧式见面礼 - Good. - European.
-对 非常欧式 -嗨 你好吗？ - Yes, very. - Hi, how are you?
-很高兴见到大家 -你认识迈克哈尔布莱施吗？ - Everybody, good to see you. - You know Michael Halbreich?
-你好 迈克 -拉里 很高兴又见面了 - Yeah, hi, Michael. - Larry, nice to see you again.
-真可爱 -我还有个蓝色的 - Very cute. - I have it in blue, too.
我也给梅丽莎买了一个 真的很不错 I gave Melissa one of those, it's really nice.
-嗨 亲爱的 -你好吗？ - Hi, honey. - You all right?
嗨 拉里 这是朱迪 很高兴在这儿见到你 Hi, Larry, it's Judy. It's nice to see you here.
已经过了大概四十五分钟了吧？ It took about 45 minutes for that, didn't it?
-上帝啊 -抱歉 拉里 - Jesus Christ. - Sorry, Larry.
得好好打招呼才行 You gotta make the nice.
-没错 -好好认识一下 - Yeah. - Gotta make the nice.
-必须要好好打招呼 -你继父还好吗？ - You've gotta make the nice. - How's the stepfather doing?
-他很好 -现在好多了？ - Good. - He's doing better now?
-对 -奇迹般地痊愈了？ - Yeah. - Yeah, miraculous recovery he had?
好了 跟我说说吧 All right, so talk to me.
我们有个很棒的节目想法想说给你们听听 We got a big show to pitch for you, big show.
-好的 -与众不同 非常有趣 - All right. - Something different and interesting.
-让主角给你们介绍吧 -好的 拉里和我最近... - I'll let the principals take care of it for you. - All right, Larry and I were talking...
讨论了这么个主意 我觉得很激动人心 about this concept recently, and I think it's pretty exciting.
你来开始吧 然后我就... All right, you start, and then l'll, you know...
跳个舞什么的 当啦啦队 do a dance and cheerlead and stuff.
那天晚上的蒜瓣面好吃吗？ How were the garlic noodles, the other night?
-什么？ -蒜瓣面？ - What? - The garlic noodles?
-我没碰你的蒜瓣面 -我没说你动了我的蒜瓣面 - I didn't touch your garlic noodles. - I didn't say you touched my garlic noodles.
-是你点了蒜瓣面 -好吧 - They were your garlic noodles. - Right.
但是你动了我的虾 But you did touch the shrimp.
你在说什么？ What are you talking about?
对吧 老艾？那天晚上我点了中餐 Right, Al? I ordered Chinese food the other night...
我们把订单搞混了 and we got our orders mixed up.
我从他那儿拿到我的饭的时候 And when I got my order back from him...
七八只虾不见了 about seven or eight shrimp were missing.
不是吧 No.
虾神秘地消失了 The shrimp mysteriously disappeared.
-我没碰过你的虾 -谁在乎啊 别说了 拉里 - I didn't touch your shrimp. - Who gives a shit, come on, Larry.
我不想说什么虾的事 I don't want to talk about shrimp.
我理解你不想说这件事 I would understand that you don't want to talk about it.
瞧 拉里 你拿到了你的饭 我也拿到了我的 Look, Larry, you got your food, l got my food.
没错 你的饭是完整的 我的少了七只虾 Yeah, you got your full order, l got mine minus seven shrimp.
你还数了 你现在是专职数虾了吗 You counted the shrimp, you're a shrimp-counter now.
只剩两只虾的时候很明显就看出来了 It's pretty obvious when there's two shrimp.
-听好了 我才没动你的破虾 -真的吗？ - Listen, I didn't touch your fucking shrimp. - Really?
想要虾的话 拿着你的 4.75 亿美金去买个捕虾船吧 If you want shrimp, take your $475 million, go buy a fucking shrimp boat.
-好的 -拉里 别这样 - Yeah, okay. - Larry, come on.
他又要溜走了 他就是靠这个出名的 He's gonna walk out now. This is what he's famous for.
二十五年了 这家伙一点儿都没变 一样的垃圾 Nothing changes in 25 years with this guy. Same shit.
对不起 我真的很抱歉 I'm really sorry. I'm so sorry.
你在干嘛？那是演的哪一出？ What where you doing? What was that?
-他侮辱我 -怎么侮辱了？ - He insulted me. - How?
他暗示我在继父的事情上撒谎了 He implied that I was lying about my stepfather.
-你根本没有继父 -我知道 但是我不喜欢他的含沙射影 - You don't have a stepfather. - I know, but I didn't like the implication.
对你想象中的继父含沙射影？ The implication for your imaginary stepfather?
如果那个人根本不存在 他怎么能侮辱得到？ How can he insult you about somebody who's imaginary?
-真是见鬼了... -因为那是... - For goodness sake... - Because it was...
我问你 虾是怎么一回事？ Let me just ask you something, what is the shrimp business?
他不小心在餐馆错拿了我的饭 You know, he got my container by mistake from the Chinese restaurant...
但是他吃了里面的八只虾... and he took out eight shrimp from it...
那些虾不是他的 然后他把饭还给我了 that didn't belong to him, and gave it back to me.
好像我看不出来他拿了虾似的 As if I wasn't gonna know that he took the shrimp?
他觉得我是白痴吗？ What does he think, l'm a moron?
拉里 所有人都干过这事 所有人都会撒谎 Larry, everybody steals shrimp, and everybody lies about it.
这是好莱坞 你得跟他道歉 This is Hollywood. You got to apologize to this guy.
-快去吧 -你得道歉 - Please. - You have to apologize.
我们想做成这件事 我不想就这么黄了 We want to make this here. I want to make this here.
-去道歉吧 -还有 我不得不说 - Go apologize. - I'll tell you something else, too.
你得好好看看心理医生了 You have to get yourself into major psychoanalysis.
我看了医生 但是没什么效果 I'm in analysis, it doesn't do anything.
-医生怎么说的？ -完全没用 - What kind of analysis? - Does nothing.
显然没用 Apparently not.
你跟他说过你想象中的继父的事吗？ Have you talked to him about your imaginary stepfather?
我现在就告诉你们 I'll tell you this right now.
我要回那家中餐馆去 我要去数虾... I'm going back to that Chinese restaurant, and l'll go count the shrimp...
还要问他们往盒子里装了几只虾 and ask them how many they put in the container.
-我敢打赌至少少了八个 -你去数吧！ - I'll bet you there's eight missing, at least. - You do that!
我们玩的是梭哈 大家先下注吧 Everyone, the game is five-card stud. Everyone ante up there.
-米奇 你是做什么的？ -我是牙医 - So, Mickey, what do you do? - I'm a dentist.
我给布拉德和茱莉亚看牙很多年了 I've been Brad and Julia's dentist for years.
真的啊 米奇 那太好了... Really, Mickey, that is good to know...
我正需要个牙医呢 我原来的牙医搬走了 because I actually need a dentist, mine just moved.
-周一给坎迪打个电话就行了 -好的 - Give Candy a call on Monday. - I will.
我的牙医跟我说我的牙跟二十五岁的小伙子一样好 You know, my dentist told me l have the gums of a 25-year-old man.
我觉得这可能是别人跟我说过的最好的话了 I think it was about the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
你跟艾伦没事了吧？ Everything's okay with you and Allan, right?
拉里 你们俩和好了吧？ Larry, you guys are all made up and everything?
-对 都和好了 -是那个关于虾的不幸事件的吗？ - Yes, we kissed and made up. - This is the unfortunate shrimp incident?
-就是那件事 -我好想知道是怎么一回事 - That's the one. - I've been dying to hear this.
他们的中餐外卖对调了 There was a mix up at a Chinese takeout restaurant.
拉里拿了艾伦的 艾伦拿了拉里的 Larry got Allan's order, and Allan, Larry's.
他们换回来的时候 艾伦拿了你的七只虾？ I guess when they switched them back, Allan had taken seven of your shrimp?
-我是这么说的 对 -据说是这样 - That's my claim, yeah. - Allegedly.
这事儿在开会的时候爆发了 他当场就走人了 Right, and it turned into a big thing and he stomped out of the meeting...
我从没见过这样的事 我都觉得不是真的 但是的确发生了 which I had never seen before. I almost thought it was not real, but it was.
前一天晚上我看了部马景涛的电影 I saw the Jackson Pollock movie the night before...
被他影响了 and I got very influenced by the artist, you know.
真令人印象深刻 It was very impressive.
但是现在都好了 我们非常高兴... But everything's fine now, and we're very delighted...
你们能找 HBO 合作 很高兴跟你们一起 you guys are with HBO, very happy to have you.
-到哪儿了？我忘了... -我弃了 她也弃了 - Where are we? I've lost... - l'm out, she's out.
我跟了 I'm in.
不 你还没弃呢 亲爱的 才发了两张 No, you're not out, sweetie, it's only two.
-哦 对 -好了 你的都好了 - God, okay. - Okay, you're good.
好吧 我真傻 All right, l'm such a ditz, okay.
拉里 你们为什么不去跟 NBC 谈... So, Larry, how come you guys didn't take the show to NBC...
你们不是都跟他们合作那么久了吗？ with the history you guys have there?
-你想回答这个问题吗？ -因为我不让他去 - You want to answer that question? - Because I wouldn't let him.
你不让他去？ You wouldn't let him?
因为通用电器往哈德逊河里倒多氯联苯 还不肯为此负责 Because GE will not take responsibility for dumpin' the PCBs in the Hudson river.
我就说 为什么还要支持他们呢？太荒谬了 And I say, why keep supporting them? It's ridiculous.
但是我想说 还有一个主要原因 就是在 HBO ... But the main thing l would like to add is that on HBO...
可以说"操" you can say "fuck."
这很诱人 And that is, you know, very tempting...
更多"操" 更多欢笑 So you throw in a "fuck," you double your laughs.
大家都喜欢脏话 都喜欢说"操" It's a crowd-pleaser. "Fuck" is a crowd-pleaser.
-你写了我就能说 -我们来玩... - You write it, and l'll say it. - The game is...
我们来玩拼胆 The game is Guts.
考验技巧的游戏 布拉德 Card skill game, Brad.
没人喜欢拼胆吗？怎么回事？ No one appreciates Guts, what's the matter?
来玩吧 玩两张牌的还是三张牌的？ Let's play it. Two-card Guts or three-card Guts?
两张牌的 两张暗牌 Two-card Guts, two cards down.
-输的人要补彩池 -一直赌直到有人退出 - Whoever loses has to match the pot. - We keep betting until people drop out.
这有不少钱啊 要破纪录了 This is stiff. This could be record-breaking.
你们演艺圈的要比牙医有钱 You show-biz types get a little richer than the dental profession.
我觉得已经有大概八百块了吧？ I'll bet you there's about $800 in there, you know that?
-至少 -好了 - I would say at least. - It's all right.
来试试吧 Let's try.
-我跟了 -太好了！ - I'm in. - Yes!
-不跟 -我也不行 - I'm out. - I can't do it either.
我都没有这么多钱 I don't even have enough to cover that.
-完全没机会 -我放弃 - Not a chance. - No, l'm out.
-得有人压啊 -对啊 - Go in, somebody. - Yeah.
梅丽莎 加油 Melissa, come on.
-不行 不跟 -迈克！ - No, out. - Michael!
-我在呢 -跟吗？ - I'm here. - In?
不 我放弃 No, l'm out.
哈尔 你必须得压了 不然就都是她的了 Hall, you must go in, she's gonna steal the whole thing.
-别让你老婆把钱都卷走了 -这有多少钱？ - Don't let your wife steal this thing. - How much is that?
-很多 -大概七八百吧 加油啊 - A lot. - It's about, $700, $800 in there, come on.
-七八百是你的了 -你认真的吗？ - $700, $800. - Are you serious?
我真的不行 我的牌太烂了 I really can't do it, l've got nothing.
我的天啊 瞧瞧 简直了 My God, look at that, holy cow.
你得告诉我们那有多少钱 You've got to tell us how much that is.
-你有什么牌？ -我只有六和十 - What did you have? - I had a 6 and a 10.
我简直不敢相信你就这么卷走了彩池 I can't believe you stole this pot.
不好意思 I'm sorry.
真会虚张声势 难以置信 你有什么牌？ What a bluff, l can't believe it. What did you have?
-什么都没有 二和四 -我也是 啥都没有 - I had nothing, 2 and a 4. - That's what I had, nothing.
-你有什么？ -我恐怕得说 我有高牌A - What did you have? - I am afraid to say I had an ace high.
-高牌A？ -亲爱的 - Ace high? - Sweetie.
我知道 但是... I know, but...
你有高牌A怎么能不跟呢？ How could you not go in with an ace high?
你个怂逼！真是个怂逼！ You cunt, what a cunt!
真不敢相信你没有跟 I can't believe that you didn't go in with that.
我只是以为她... I just thought she...
你那真是手好牌啊 这轮牌真不错 What a hand, that's a great hand for this game.
你有高牌A怎么能不跟呢？ How could you not go in with an ace high?
我觉得你刚才说的有辱女性 I think that's kind of a misogynist thing to say.
没事吧 我只是在开玩笑 Come on, l'm kidding around.
代表牌桌上所有的女性 还有我自己 我觉得被冒犯了 On behalf of the women at this table, and myself, I am offended by that.
拜托 我们只是在打牌啊 Please, we're playing poker here.
那种话不能出现在游戏里... That kind of language is not allowed in a game...
这是个干净的牌桌 in a decent game.
完全不能接受 很不妥 That's so unacceptable, that's not okay.
没事 我没事 It's okay, l'm fine. It's fine.
怎么能没事 你知道吗 该走了 这样行吗？ It's not fine. You know what, time to go, how about that?
对 今晚就到这儿吧 Yeah, I think l'm gonna call it a night...
帕里什夫妇下周就回来了吧？ and the Parishes are back next week, right?
对 他们从加拉帕戈斯回来 Yeah, they're back from the Galapagos.
很高兴见到你们 谢谢 It was nice meeting you guys, thank you.
十分感谢 Thank you so much.
-我会给你打电话... -好的 打给坎迪 - I'm gonna call you about my... - You do that, call Candy.
-再见 感谢能来 -见到你们很高兴 - Bye, thanks for coming. - It was nice meeting you.
如果冒犯到了谁 我很抱歉 I'm sorry if I offended anyone.
谢谢你们过来 见到你们很高兴 Thanks for coming you guys, it was great to see you.
下周再见 Yeah, we'll see you next week.
我们估计不会再被叫去... So I guess we probably won't be invited back...
参加他们的扑克之夜了 to their poker night.
-没错 我也觉得 -是吧？ - Yeah, I don't think so. - You think?
-我不敢相信你做出那样的事 -拜托 - I can't believe you did that. - Come on.
你直接喊出了"逼" 对着所有女人... You just shouted out the C-word in front of women...
对着在场所有的人... in front of other people...
那个词只是用来形容一个人不够爷们儿 lt's a word you use when somebody doesn't act manly.
他是不够爷们儿 他应该要跟的 And he didn't act manly, he should've gone in.
他有A就应该跟牌 He should've gone in with that ace.
我觉得你可以用其他的词... I think there are other words that you could use...
除了那个以外 besides that one.
现在想想 我可能应该说"胆小鬼" Maybe in retrospect, l should've said, "Pussy."
-天啊 我不可能... -我很震惊 - Jeez, I can't be... - l'm really shocked.
那个人居然说我厌女 I can't believe that guy called me a misogynist.
-是啊 -从没人这么说过我 - I know. - Nobody ever called me that before.
也许你真的厌女 也许我现在更加了解你了 Maybe you are. Maybe, l'm learning things about you.
也许真是这样 也许我喜欢打打老婆什么的 Maybe I am a misogynist. Maybe I like to beat my wife a little bit.
-等等 不！拉里！ -你个小贱货 - Wait, no! Larry! - You little bitch.
好了 我会乖乖的 我保证 Okay, l'll be good, I promise.
-系好了！ -我在系 - Buckle up! - I'm buckling.
沃瑟曼说这是你最后一次机会了 没戏了 And Wasserman says this is our last chance. This is it.
就因为你对哈尔布莱施说的话 'Cause of what you said to Halbreich.
HBO 所有的女的都不想跟你共事了 All of the women at HBO, they don't want to work with you.
-噢 拜托 不可理喻 -他们都觉得你厌女 - Oh, come one. That's ridiculous. - They think you're a misogynist.
怎么？就因为我叫他"逼"了？那又怎样！ Why? 'Cause I called the guy a cunt, so what!
就因为你叫他"逼"了 'Cause you called the guy a cunt.
多大事儿啊 我经常叫男的"混蛋" 他们还是想跟我合作 Big deal, I call men pricks all the time, men want to work with me.
"逼"更严重 Cunt's worse.
没有更严重啊 "蛋"和"逼"是平等的 It's not worse, pricks and cunts, they're equal.
-混蛋 怂逼 拜托 一样的啊 -不是的 "逼"严重多了 - Pricks, cunts, come on. They balance out. - No, cunt's much heavier.
-为什么严重多了？ -我没想过 就是这样的 - Why is cunt heavier? - I never questioned, it just is.
-这是性别歧视啊 -迈克哈尔布莱施请假了 - That's sexist to me, come on. - Michael Halbreich took a leave of absence.
什么意思？ What do you mean?
你叫他"逼"之后 他深受震惊... From you calling him a cunt, he's shell-shocked...
他在重新审视他的人生 and he's examining everything in his life.
所以请假了 Taking a leave of absence.
-我去 真的吗？ -对 - Man, is that so? - Yeah.
真是的 你知道... Shit, you know...
我以为他是那种女性化的异性恋 l thought he was one of those effeminate heterosexuals.
没有女性化的异性恋这回事 There's no such thing as an effeminate heterosexual.
你要么是同性恋要么不是 他是的 他是弯的 You're either gay or you're not gay. He was gay, he's gay.
你们好 需要入座吗？ Hi, would you like to be seated?
不 我只是有点好奇... No, actually, l'm a little curious about something...
我们在争论一件事 we're having a little dispute.
你们一般往宫保虾里面放几只虾？ How many shrimp do you generally put in the kung pao shrimp?
十一只 Eleven.
-一直都是十一只？ -我们对这个规定很严格 - You always put in 11? - We have a very strict policy about that.
非常感谢 Thank you very much.
-嗨 米奇 -谢丽儿 你来了 - Hi, Mickey. - So it's this Cheryl.
-是的 很高兴再见面 -我也一样 - Yes, good to see you again. - Good to see you again.
-那次打牌真是很特别啊 -是的 - That was quite a poker game. - Yes.
我觉得我们从来没有过那样的牌局 I don't think we ever had one like that.
是的 拉里有的时候会有点过于兴奋了 Yeah, Larry can get a little carried away sometimes, I guess.
他对于打牌非常... He takes his poker very...
这些淤青啊 说来有趣了 This bruise, there's a funny story here.
谢丽儿 我们并不怎么熟... Cheryl, you know, I barely know you...
但是那天晚上打完牌之后... but when we were coming out of the poker game the other night...
我们看到你在车里... we saw into your car...
也看到了拉里打你 and we saw Larry hitting you.
拉里和我有时候会假装他打我... Larry and I do a little bit sometimes where he acts like he's punching me...
我也配合他说 "我受伤了" and I act like, "l'm getting hurt."
-我们只是在... -请原谅我... - We just kind of... - You'll have to excuse me...
我不常遇到这种事... l don't deal with this kind of thing often...
但是如果你想跟我谈谈这件事... but if you would like to talk with me about this...
在这个隔间... in this cubicle...
我们有医患保密协议 we have patient-doctor confidentiality.
牙医也有保密协议？ And that applies to dentists, too?
我认为是的 I think so.
我觉得我们互相理解有偏差 I think we're on the wrong page here.
我有个很好的社工朋友... Yeah, I have a very good social-worker friend...
米奇 听着 这完全是误会 Mickey, listen, this is a complete misunderstanding.
没有误会 There's no misunderstanding.
打牌的时候拉里对迈克做的事... What we saw Larry do to Michael at that card game...
我看到他在车里打你 这不可能有错 there's no misunderstanding that I saw him beating you in your car.
我看到了拉里大卫的所作所为 那家伙就是个禽兽... I have seen Larry David in action, and that man is an animal...
必须阻止他 and he has to be stopped.
拉里？ Larry?
就是这样了 这事儿传遍了 HBO So that's it, it's all over at HBO.
牙医跟沃瑟曼联系了 他觉得我打老婆 Dentist got in touch with Wasserman, thinks l'm a wife-beater.
他觉得我是个打老婆的人 He thinks l'm a wife-beater.
-简直太疯狂了 -我知道 - I mean, it's so crazy. - I know.
-还有别的电视台 对吧？ -没了 HBO 又不是世界末日 - There's other networks, right? - This is not the end of the world, HBO.
我们去找 ABC 不一定非要是 HBO We'll go to ABC. I don't have to be at HBO.
-没错 -"这不是电视"？就是电视嘛 - No. - It's not TV? It's TV.
不然人们在看什么？ What do they think people are watching?
-就是 -在电视上看的 - Yeah. - Watch it on TV.
不是吗？又不是去电影院去看 Don't you? You don't go to the movies to see it.
-用餐还愉快吗？ -我吃好了 - How are we doing over here, folks? - I think l'm done.
这个能帮您拿走吗？太好了 Can I get this out of the way for you? Great.
-很好吃 -你喜欢吗？ - Delicious. - You like it?
-嗯 -那就好 - Yeah. - Great.
要看看甜点菜单吗？我们有很不错的甜点 How about dessert menu? We got a lot of good stuff.
-好啊 -不用了 我们买单吧 - Yeah, excellent. - You know what, I think we'll take the bill.
-你确定？好的 我马上回来 -我们去沙特尔斯吃甜点吧 - You sure? Okay, l'll be right back. - Let's go to Shutters and get dessert there.
-换个地方 -你不想在这儿吃甜点？ - Just get a change of scenery. - You don't want dessert here?
去其他地方吃更有趣 It would just be more fun to go someplace else.
在沙滩旁放松一下 Relax by the beach.
但是我们已经在这了 两分钟之内就可以吃的到甜点... But we're already here. We could have dessert in two minutes...
-然后我们就能... -但是不光是吃甜点 - then we could... - But it's not all about just the dessert.
-还有什么？ -同时可以是个小小的冒险... - What's it about? - It's a little bit of an adventure...
去其他地方 看看新的风景 to go some place else and see something new.
我不觉得那是什么探险 I don't know if that's any adventure, really.
-是一种探险 -那也叫探险？ - That's an adventure. - That's an adventure?
你知道吗 算了 You know what, fine.
-别 等下 我不懂 -我是说 这太蠢了 - No, wait, I just don't get it. - I mean, because it's ridiculous.
-我们在吃饭 -我们本来很开心... - We're having a meal. - We're having a good time...
-然后我提议去别的... -你打断了我们的开心时光... - and I suggest to go to some... - You're breaking up the good time...
是你打断了 You're breaking up the good time.
因为我想在吃晚饭后喝杯咖啡 'Cause I feel like l want a cup of coffee after I eat dinner.
我才不想起来开车到别的地方 I don't feel like getting up and driving some place.
你知道吗 拉里 我现在只想回家 You know, Larry, l would just like to go home.
只喝一杯低咖行吗？ Quick cup of decaf?
我带走行吗？ Can I get it to go?
但是那不一样 That's different, though.
-请问是大卫夫人吗？ -是的 - Are you Mrs. David? - Yes, I am.
你好 我是社区服务的琳达约翰逊 Hi, l'm Linda Johnson from Social Services.
我们接到电话说您家里... We received a phone call that there was some domestic violence...
有家庭暴力发生 going on in this household.
其实那都只是误会 Actually, this is all a big misunderstanding.
这个啊 Yeah, this.
您想起诉吗？ Would you care to press charges?
翻译:Carol 校对:白羽黑鹭 英语字幕来源：tvsubtitles.net